Contact Information

I have really enjoyed my discussion group. I think Group 1 Rocks! I found myself reading everyone's blog whether I had to post on it or not. The discussion group was really good and made me think about different aspects of what we were discussing. The blog thing scared me when I first began my Master's program, but I have thoroughly enjoyed it! I didn't think I would have enough things to write about. I have enjoyed posting just as much as I have reading. I really want to thank those who were bold enough to post personal experiences on their blog and discussion boards. It made everything very real for me and gave me a way to apply it to everyday life. I would love to stay in contact with anyone who is willing.
I especially enjoyed the blogs of Sondi and Johan and Toni. I felt a special bond with Toni because she works with Head Start and so do I. I also used to be a Home Visitor so we had a couple things in common.

My contact info is:

Susann Brown
sbrown@pcdcva.org

adjournment

When looking at the Adjournment phase of team building, I feel like this is what I strive for. I think this is what I most enjoy about all team collaborations. When we look back and see what went well, what didn't do so well, what we would or wouldn't do again. The only time I can remember that happening (having an adjournment phase was this September when we held a Community Volunteer Luncheon. It was held in recognition of our 40th Anniversary of the non-profit agency I work for. I really enjoyed looking back over each item we accomplished that day. It felt good to think about what an impact some things made on the Community Partners. It was also helpful to look at things that didn't go so well and think of ways to improve them for next time. I often think of all the colleagues that I interact with while working on my Master's degree. I hope to be able to maintain contact with various colleagues so they may be resources throughout my career, as well as personal friends in the same field. One thing I learned in the beginning of the Master's program is a network of colleagues in the field can be very resourceful!

Disagreements and Conflicts

This week has really been a big conflict. I have said in several portions of this weeks' assignments that this was the right time for me to have this class. I learned from this week to take a look at the other person actually having a perspective and a different view. I learned that I needed to take a look at the fact that this new teacher that I am dealing with may not necessarily be crazy, but just different. I also learned that if I respect, reciprocate, and respond that things worked out much better. I am so glad this assignment came when it did. It helped improve the meeting that I called to straighten some things out with this teacher. I left the meeting feeling much better than when we came in because our issues were communicated much more positively than if I had gone in without having read these resources. The three R's were a large part of our conflict being resolved. I really needed to see them.

Communication Surveys

The thing that surprised me most about others perceptions of my communication was the fact that the two people that evaluated me felt like I was comfortable and relaxed. I find myself feeling nervous when speaking among groups. I don't mean that I feel really, really scared or nervous but I don't feel cool as a cucumber either. (SMILE) It surprised me that they felt that I was comfortable when speaking with them. I guess two things that I have learned were to focus more on being relaxed and present for the conversation instead of trying to be so perfect and solve every problem. The other thing I learned is that sometimes you need to take a moment and check with associates and colleagues and let them tell you how you are doing. The way you feel may be one way and the way they feel could be another. I was more afraid that my colleagues may have evaluated me at a worse perception than I did myself. Actually it came out that I was doing better than I thought! So I think learning to accept others criticism of your communication skills is very important.

3 Strategies for Effective Communication

1. I will remember that individuals in a certain group are just that-individual. That each person has their own being in that group. I will remember not to assume that they all are the same.

2. I will continue to learn as much as I can about all groups or cultures of people. I will try to broaden my knowledge on a regular basis. Broadening my knowledge will include reading, studying and researching other ethnicities and cultures, beginning with those I work directly with first.

3. Lastly, but to me most importantly I will and already do use the "Platinum Rule."
I try to treat others that I communicate with the way I would want to be treated if I was in their situation. I remind myself often when working with my families that I could very easily be thrust into their situation. I want to communicate with them on a level they understand and a level that doesn't demean them. I will work on improving my use of the "Platinum Rule."

TV Show Experience

I chose to record the show "Haters." This was the first time I watched the show and I actually hadn't even heard of it before. When looking at it with no sound I saw Snooky from Jersey Shore on there. I thought she was going on a date with this guy and it looked like she was saying nice things to him because she didn't make any frowns or scrunced up faces or anything. After looking at it with sound I found out she was saying some ugly things to him. She wasn't there to go out with him either. She was there because the guy was telling everyone she was a drunk and she was crazy and she wanted him to get to know her better. I also noticed when I watched it with sound that the sound effects they were playing emphasized the point the characters were making. I learned that I would like to be able to have that face that snooky had when she was talking. It wasn't a face that went either way. I want to be able to remain neutral when communicating so that people won't feel like I am judging or choosing sides. An aha moment I had was when watching one of the characters on the show who was the mother of the guy. I noticed that I do raise my eyebrows and make faces when someone is trying to hold a conversation with me if I question what they are telling me. I also wrinkle my nose when someone is asking me to do something that I don't really want to do. They don't even have to ask me anything because my body language is saying it all. Watching the mother reminded me of myself when I talk to people.

Competent Communication

If I think about a person who demonstrates competent communication it would have to be my pastor. I see him in group settings and sometimes individually one on one and he is always the same. He listens as people are speaking, he doesn't interupt and when its time to respond he speaks slowly and carefully. I have seen him remain completely neutral during meetings. This has even made me wonder which side is he on? He is excellent communicating even with my two children ages 11 and 5. I like the fact that he listens first and foremost. That is one behavior he exhibits that makes him effective. The second thing he does is maintain constant eye contact. This is important to me when I am talking to someone because even if they are not paying attention, it makes me think they are. The third thing I like is he is a mediator. You can't ever seem to see him take any one side. This is an important behavior in communication because you want someone to be able to hear all sides of an issue and discuss the information without forcing their opinion down your throat. I especially would like to model these behaviors after him. I think of people that I have come across in my lifetime that were pushy and when you hold a conversation with them it was their way or no way, and people talk about them. It was in a negative way that people were talking about them. I don't want to be talked about in that way and sure wouldn't want my parents and families that I serve feel like I was that way. I want to be able to help support and encourage my families in their own beliefs and way of thinking not conform them to my world!